It’s strange, my beloved reader, how my blog life
works. I have this list of things I need
and want to write about. Topics that
range from The Sacrifice of Happiness, to Optimistic Branches on a Pessimistic
Tree, even The Positive Influence in a Negative World (look for all of these …eventually). However, it seems that almost every day
something new is added to the mix, and it’s my duty as a writer to prioritize
what to write about. Then come my lunch
hour I get the honor of writing for you.
As a dear friend pointed out to me today, it seems there’s an
uptrend of behavior that is, at the least, disturbing. Lately (or mayhap I have only been noticing
it lately) people have been jumping to conclusions or their own “personal
truths” much faster than usual. With all
this jumping, you’d think we, as a society, would be in better shape! You see, when someone hears something (a
rumor, half a story of something that has happened, or even an outright lie)
they immediately draw their own conclusions, and get PISSED OFF at whatever it
is. They are ready for a fight, they
want to punch someone, kick someone’s ass, protest the government, whatever the
case may be.
While a part of me admires the fact that people are quick to
defend their friends and what they may perceive as a ‘wronging’, it’s disheartening
to know that people don’t care about the truth when doing so. Moreover, it saddens me to witness the fact
that they will immediately jump to violence to solve the situation. This, kittens, is how people end up dying;
when we start rationalizing the concept that violence is an acceptable answer
to a problem.
Let me give you an example of what I’m talking about. Someone posts a new status on Facebook (let’s
be honest, everything is on Ye Ol’ BookFace these days):
Poster: “OMG.. I just got chewed out by my boss at work, I’m
crying and I’m so pissed off.”
This, friends, is a valid Facebook post, and one we’ve all
seen from time to time. Everyone has had
a boss that we don’t necessarily get along with. And we love to post on Facebook in the heat
of the moment; it’s therapeutic. However,
it’s the comments that follow that make my point.
Friend A: “What an
asshole, I hope he finds himself in a dark alley tonight and gets the shit
kicked out of him”
Friend B: “Yea, tell
me what alley – I’ll bring a crowbar with me and show him what it’s like to be
hurt”
Friend C: “ Seriously.
What a jerk; hope he crosses the street in front of me, my “breaks may
fail.””
Seriously people… why the violence? Why not a supporting and understanding
response? Let’s continue, shall we?
Friend D: Holy Shit,
I’m so sorry! What happened? PS… are you
free for ice cream therapy tonight after work?
Poster: @Friend
D: Ice Cream therapy would be great;
honestly, it was my fault and I deserved to be yelled at, I really screwed up a
financial report that the Manager received and he was furious. I’m so pissed off at myself for letting it
happen, I can’t stop crying.”
AHHHH…there it is…the truth and most of the full story. Notice
that the only person the Poster responded to was the one that offered support
and NOT violence (three and a half brownie points for the Poster for not giving
into the violence). Friends A, B, and C immediately jumped to the conclusion
that the Boss was being unreasonable and assumed he should be hurt because of
it. Nowhere in the post did it say the Boss
yelled, was verbally abusive, or unjustified in his discipline of his
employee. People just assumed it. It wasn’t
the case. As you see, the Poster later
detailed the situation a little better (probably after they calmed down a bit)
and it turns out even the Poster themselves think the discipline was in
order.
This whole concept takes me back to something I learned in a
workshop called The Energy Project. It’s
an excellent program, I highly suggest it if you ever get the chance to
experience it. The particular activity I’m
referring to is “Fact versus Story”. We
LOVE to assume we know the whole story behind something when only a fact is
provided to us.
“Wow… some a&&h*le just cut me off in traffic, good
to know he thinks he’s the only one who matters. I should have forced him into the wall” What’s the fact in this statement? The person who wrote the statement was cut
off in traffic. The rest is a story
made up to go behind the fact. The other
driver may not be an asshole, and I doubt he thinks he’s the only one that
matters. There are a variety of reasons
he may have cut the person off: maybe
the person was in his blindspot, maybe he’s rushing to the hospital because his
wife was in an accident and he’s not thinking straight, maybe he’s having a
health issue. Maybe the guy is a
downright jerk and just cut someone off.
The point is, NOBODY but that driver knows the story behind the fact, so
jumping to a conclusion doesn’t do anyone any good. And resorting to violence (forcing what could
be a multiple car accident) is NEVER the right response.
So, kittens, here’s the bottom line: rumors, half truths, down-right lies, and the
like are NOT something to act negatively upon.
We are forever hearing something that we know may not be the entire
story – so instead of immediately jumping to our own conclusion – why not try
to find out more about the situation? If
that’s not possible, then offer support and help to in a positive and
enlightened manner; it will be much more beneficial to everyone involved.
Today’s personal challenge:
work on recognizing the difference between FACT and STORY. Take a step back before you react to
something, and react with compassion and understanding instead of anger and
violence; you may be surprised the responses you get.
Much Love
Trinity
Be at peace with yourself and you’ll be at peace with the world
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